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Tony Lance · Guest

Big Bertha Thing coil
Cosmic Ray Series
Possible Real World System Constructs
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance/coil.html
Access page JPG 9K Image
Astrophysics net ring access site
Newsgroup Reviews including alt.politics

Two drawings of a Gyroscopic Top complete with coil.

Extract from Introductory Chapter;-
The fact is that the toe is magnetic, and this being the case
it is easy to see that the rolling of the toe on the side
of the metal produces the motion. But Figs. XV. (a) and (b)
illustrate a top, whose spindle behaves in exactly the same
manner as the toe of the spider top, and yet is in no way magnetic.
The action is purely mechanical, as we shall explain in later pages.
It is an attractive top to watch, especially as it rushes round
the corner when it comes to the end of the coil.

From the book
An Elementary Treatment of the Theory of
Spinning Tops and Gyroscopic Motion.
By Harold Crabtree M.A.
Formerly Scholar of Pembroke College, Cambridge
Assistant Master at Charterhouse
Longmans, Green and Co. 1923
First Edition 1909
Second Edition 1914
New Impression 1923
(C) Copyright Tony Lance 1998
Distribute complete and free of charge to comply.

Big Bertha Thing fiction

Anything but a fact, changes the face of twentieth century science.
9. Gyroscopic Top motion along coil masks a weaker field effect.

The Japanese antigravity experiment only worked one way.
With the object spinning one way OK, but the other way failed.
Anything but a fact...
10. One way gravity reduced and other way gravity increased,
so is bi-polar field efftect.
11. No antigravity, which is not bi-polar, so contradicts
bi-polar field effect.

Wave Particle Duality Paradox two slit interference patterns
can be disrupted by;-
1. Passive sensor near 2nd slit.
2. Turning room light on.
Anything but a fact...
12. LCD digital watch, without backlight, near 2nd slit.
13. Thicker wall between slits.

Redshift is both speedometer and tape measure.
According to redshift speedo, the universe has a go faster
stripe painted on the outside.
Anything but a fact...
14. No Big Bang, which needs go faster stripe on the inside
or antigravity.
15. No redshift speedo due to Steady State, which needs
neither to have go faster stripe.

Wave Particle Duality needs 1 slit and 2 slit experiments
to give different results from same effect. Make the walls
inside and outside the slits the same size and centre of
gravity.
Anything but a fact...
16. Centre of gravity is at slit in one, but not the other.
17. Equal forces act on the slit in one, but not the other.
18. Wave Particle Duality as a field effect gives different
results from same effect.

Tony Lance
judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk

From: Tony Lance <judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk>
Newsgroups: swnet.sci.astro,sci.chem
Subject: Re: Big Bertha Thing testament
Date: Tue, 13 Feb 2007 14:00:03 +0000

Thursday, November 13, 1997 01:53:36 PM
Message
From: Tony Lance
Subject: Re: spam and tony
To: FC Mods Discussion
Guilty as charged, I should not have done any of the following;-
1. defended you in the mods conf.
2. given you an invitation, when the dogs were at the door.
3. offered a refuge for the explosion survivors.
4. ticked off the mods.
5. put your name up in lights on OUSA Astronomy and Astronomy and Space.
6. Put back the release of my software package, just because of the troubles.

Personally I would take me out and shoot me, there is no punishment too bad for
any mod, who gets even one complaint. We should be above reproach,
like Caesers' wife.

I will of course remove the words 'Extract to explain the project to Philip Sims'
from all further postings.
Please accept my appologies for all the bad things I did,
before your elevation to mod. I only pick on little people.

Thank you,
Tony Lance.

Tony Lance · Guest

Big Bertha Thing balloon
Cosmic Ray Series
Possible Real World System Constructs
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance/balloon.html
7K Web Page
Astrophysics net ring access site
Newsgroup Reviews including sci.optics

The "Monstre" Balloon

From the book
The Ingoldsby Legends
by the Rev. Richard H. Barham
Published by Richard Edward King,
88 Curtain Road,
London E.C.
Inscribed;-
Barbara Death
From Aunt Emma
March 6th 1921
(C) Copyright Tony Lance 1999
Distribute complete and free of charge to comply.

Big Bertha Thing welfare

29th April 1999
Operations Manager,
The Benefits Agency,

Dear Sirs,

Further to your letter of 28th April 1999,
regarding a list of questions, on the possibility of my working at all.

I will attempt to answer your questions, in order as listed in your letter.

1.I am not working, I am just pottering arround on the internet.
I last registered for course work with the Open University in
1997. This would have involved 6 hours work per week.
I could only manage half-an-hour per day, so totally failed
to do the work or complete the course. Not even one homework
assignment was completed.
In August 1997, I bought a second hand computer for 150 pounds
sterling, and was given free access to the Open University
computer along local telephone lines at a call charge of
1p per minute.
Since that time, I managed to build up a body of correspondence,
within the limits of half-an-hour per day mental or physical work.
In January 1999, this correspondence was transfered by me to my
web site; www.bertha.ndirect.co.uk(since disabled.)
I have to pay 14 pounds and 9p per month for this site.

2.Nobody suggested it, it just happened.
3.My doctor does not know that I have a web site.
4.See answer 1 for description of my activities.
No job is being done, so no job description exists.

5.No employer exists or payments have been recieved.
6.I can think straight for half-an-hour per day.
The rest of the time is spent pottering arround.
I can do one side of A4 paper of mathematics
or computer work per day.

7.On any day free of a major shopping expedition,
I can do half-an-hour of original work and
about an hour of copy typing at non-typist speeds.

8.My principle interest is a 50 year scientific project,
which was started 30 years ago.
If I could spend 48 hours per week doing it I would.
However half-an-hour work and an hour pottering,
seems to be all I can manage and
at that not every day of the week.
Due to my condition, I asked Mrs. Pam S....,
a fellow Open University student to be the project archivist
for my work on the Open University computer.
She agreed and kept the archive of the correspondence
which is now on my web site. This is both an unusual
request and an unusually generous service
to a fellow student on incapacity benefit.

9.Zero income for as far as the eye can see.
10.Not applicable, zero wages or income.
11.August 1997 and is ongoing.

I trust that the above will put the internet feeding frenzy
of the newspaper hype into some perspective.

Thank you,
Tony Lance
judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk

From: Tony Lance <judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk>
Newsgroups: swnet.sci.astro,sci.chem
Subject: Re: Big Bertha Thing testament
Date: Wed, 14 Feb 2007 13:45:56 +0000

Friday, November 21, 1997 06:15:45 PM
Message
From: Tony Lance
Subject: First Aid Tent on Classical Particle
To: Erica Clifford
Philip Sims
Cc: Tracey Sait
gary.s Cresswell
Jonno Johnson
Big Bertha Thing 2 knitting
To: FC Mods Discussion
To: CP Conf
From: Philip Sims Moderator

2. Without loss of generality, one can take p to be north and a positive definite metric
rather than a Lorentzian one, there is a geodesic of minimal length,
rather than a geodesic of maximum length.
This minimal geodesic will be a line of longitude running from p to q.
BUT there will be another geodesic from p to q which runs down the back up to q.
This geodesic contains a point conjugate to p at the south where all the geodesics
from p intersect. Both the geodesics from p to q are stationary under a small variation.

By Erica Clifford
Head of First Aid Tent on Classical Particle Conference
(Extract from Open University Course Unit Nameless)
End of Big Bertha 2

Erika meet Philip.
Philip meet Erika.

Philip will post your Big Bertha Victim Support postings,
to immortalise each victim in print.
No more than one per victim.
No more than one per day.
Please remember more Sesame Street, than Darth Vader.
If a picture paints a thousand words, then why can't I
paint you?

Each will have a unique pattern name, from the following
list, prepared by my wife. You can add to it yourself, as
needed.

Would some kind person, please send a letter of thanks and
explanation of what it will be used for, to my wife.
She loves me dearly, but thinks I am a typical husband.
Waste of space, makes the room look untidy and needs
dusting round. At least it keeps me sane, healthy and
contented.

List
knitting Erika
fairisle
aran
rib
cable
fisherman
moss
plain
purl
blanket
cross
tacking
hemming
herringbone
tartan
plaid
argyle

Thank for all your help and support.
Tony Lance

Tony Lance · Guest

Big Bertha Thing invite
Cosmic Ray Series
Possible Real World System Constructs
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance/invite.html
Access page to 55K Zip File
Astrophysics net ring access site
Newsgroup Reviews including alt.politics.bush

301 files from the third battle of cyberspace. (part two)

60 Newsgroup postings were deleted, after 15 hours.
There were claims of major hacker attack,
which turned to abashed embarassment.

It turned out that the NSP owner,
had sent out a world-wide posting.
It invited all users, who had forgotten their passwords,
to just leave it blank. Then a new confirmation password
would be sent. Cinderela was invited to the ball.

Thank you,
Tony Lance

Big Bertha Thing format

Anybody heard of the fly-paper trap?
Where all the flies are collected, in an unsightly mess,
hanging from the kitchen ceiling.
The expensive version is the lizard with a long tongue,
that retracts after each catch.

Take an uncensored version of a usenet newsgroup,
show the subject line of each thread header,
with the total number of postings and the net
number of postings after extracts.
Put the total number of extracts, in the first line,
at the top of the list of postings.
Anyone wishing to search the extracts clicks on it
and finds each person extracted with 2 lines each.
The first line shows the number of thread headers
and the second the number of replies.
Further clicks go down to posting level.

Extract everyone with more than 1000 postings
on any single newsgroup, from all newsgroups.

Examples of the fly-paper trap can be found on:-
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance/news.html
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance/want04.html
Thank you,
Tony Lance
judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk

24 November 1997 22:26:03
Message
From: Tony Lance
Subject: First Aid Tent on Classical Particle
To: Ben Plumpton
Cc: Pam Scruton
Attachments: ARCH0000.TXT 2K
I am apalled by your action, in summarilly deleting, the message from the victim support
group, which consists
entirely of people, that internet thugs have spammed into a comatose state.

Do you want them to have a relapse? Please be a bit more circumspect, in your dealings
with them in future.

I am passing your message to me, on to Pam, whom I feel is better qualified to give you an
objective answer.

Assuring you of my full support, in your efforts as mod.

Thank You,

Tony Lance

Tony Lance · Guest

Big Bertha Thing moisture
Cosmic Ray Series
Possible Real World System Constructs
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance/moisture.html
Access page to 73K ZIP file
Astrophysics net ring access site
Newsgroup Reviews including misc.health.aids

Working Prototype of second phase Pastures software,
with 20 polyhedrons model and 200 buckminster fullerine molecules model,
complete with programs, source code in listing format and using Pastures
documentation.

Moisture Software Package.
(Based on Particle Structure Results Program, in Fortran 77.)
Sub-atomic Mesons, Baryons and Leptons Classification System.
(C) Copyright Tony Lance 1997
Distribute complete and free of charge to comply.

Big Bertha Thing virus

18th October 1999
Hi Chris,
Thanks for the Keyboard.drv, but Windows is still down.
The new messages are;
1. Clock General Protection Fault in gdi.exe (system)
2. Progman Ditto krnl386.exe (system)

Clock.exe see windows. Progman.exe see windows.
The two options seem to be, to try another four files
for windows 3.11 or save up and update PC. (130 pounds)

They have a nice 486DX66 16MB 270MB hard-drive 14" SVGA
and win 95, at the same place I bought the 386PC. It
is four times faster too. My biggest program takes 7 hours
on standard IBM PC, 90 minutes on 386 and 20 minutes on
486DX, which has a built in maths co-processor.

My DOS browser can read newsgroups, send/receive e-mail, browse
web, but not receive attachments, look up my own site or
update it.

Keyboard.drv worked, but closed down every app in windows,
so there was no way out. Clever that. The scrub round was
in the book, for bypassing emm386. Wait till boot up gets
to MSDOS loading and press F8. Step through Config.sys
line-by-line with y answer. It then goes through autoexec.bat
to last line of win. N answer drops you out to DOS prompt.

Strange to say I can still work on my science maths project
using Fortran 77 in DOS. Apps down with windows are Free Agent,
WS-ftple, Winzip, F-Prot, Anyware Virus, Chekmate Virus, FirstClass
client.

It looks like I picked up a macro virus off a wordperfect attachment
from e-mail of a guy in newsgroup. Three virus apps missed it.
It is visible in notepad view of file after saving with write.exe.
Isolate 386 and do not update site.

You might check that my site is still up, by the back door and let me
know the count. <www.bertha.ndirect.co.uk/series.htm>

It could not have happened to a nicer chap.
Thank you,
Tony Lance

Big Bertha Thing designer

Once there was Big Blue, Baby Bell and Pax IBM.
Now ther is Big Bertha, Baby Bill and Pax Microsoft.

1980 The Greater London Council, Central Computer Service installation
standards for IBM mainframe had standard date subroutines as mandatory.

1980 No standards for Prime minicomputer, so date subroutine for program
was written to be 2075 OK, by me.

All IBM customers and suppliers applied IBM standards. Enforcement of these
standards means that the following instances can only be designer
software obsolescence.(Smoking Gun features.)
1. First PC operating system DOS was written 1980 (IBM/Microsoft) No 2000
2. Next PC operating system MS-DOS (Microsoft) No 2000
3. Windows 95 enabled macro virus (Microsoft) admitted
4. Windows 95 macro virus written by Microsoft.(admitted)
5. Windows 95 macro virus released by Microsoft.(admitted)
6. Windows 98 enabled text virus (Microsoft) admitted
7. Windows 98 no product recall, fix is on Microsoft website only.
8. Windows 98 to release virus just say it exists and fix is on website.
9. 1997 MS-DOS 6.20 licensed copy sold for Microsoft with no 2000.
10. 1999 Windows 3.11 virus closes all applications leaving no exit.

Big Bertha Thing history

1st virus was boot sector virus, which was first sector of floppy disc or
start here sector.

2nd virus was program virus, which is enabled with on/off switch, by
operating system as primary function thereoff.(exe, sys, com)

3rd virus was macro virus, which is enabled with on/off switch, by
wordprocessor or other application software.(doc)

4th virus was zip virus, which is enabled with on/off switch, by
zip application software.(zip)

5th virus was text virus, which is enabled with on/off switch, by
operating system as a purely viral function, otherwise uneccessary.(txt)
Since 1980 the text virus has been impossible. 18 years to crack it, with
Windows 98 by Microsoft.

42 million Windows 3.xx users.
12 million e-mail only users.
Windows 95 not known.
Windows 98 not known.

Tony Lance
judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk

From: Tony Lance <judemarie (AT) bigberthathing (DOT) co.uk>
Newsgroups: swnet.sci.astro,sci.chem
Subject: Big Bertha Thing mayor
Date: Wed, 21 Feb 2007 14:06:57 +0000

Big Bertha Thing mayor

4th October 2000
ex-GLC LPFA/DETR pension rights abuse case
Mr.Ken Livingstone
Mayor of Greater London
Dear Sir,
Local Government Pension Scheme Appeal
In their letter of 12th May 2000, from Mr.K.A.Bloomfied, the DETR upheld
my appeal. I would be gratefull for the opportunity to summarize
subsequent events.

I had applied for early retirement on medical grounds, to the London
pension Fund Authority. My last appeal was to the DETR. They upheld my
appeal and instructed LPFA to grant me an independant medical review.
The grounds were that the LPFA Medical Advisor was under qualified and not
independant enough. Their decision was final and they would not discuss
the matter further. Any further appeal would be to the Ombudsman.

The LPfA Director claims that the LPFA Medical Advisor is qualified and
shows a letter discussing the qualification. He claims that due to this,
the instruction is void and he proposes to take no further action.

DETR was the statutory supervisory body for the LPFA.
LPFA is the statutory successor authority to the Greater London Council.
The Ombudsman has no authority to enforce his judgement on the LPFA.

Under the GLC, the final appeal was to a committee of members of the
council. Upon abolition by statutory transfer, the final appeal was to
be to the Secretary of State for DETR; Mr.John Prescott MP.

Since July 2000 the LPFA is directly accountable to Mr.Ken Lingstone.
Would you please sort out this problem for me. I enclose below some
of my correspondence with the DETR and DHSS, as background.

Thanking you in anticipation of your kind attention to this matter.
Yours sincerely,
Tony Lance

Big Bertha Thing minister

Contact Mr. Phil Goodwin
Director of Operations
London Pensions Fund Authority
8th February 2000
For the Attention of Mr. John Prescott,
Government Minister,
Secretary of State for the Environment, Transport and the Regions,
Local Government Pensions Division,
Department of the Environment, Transport and the Regions,
Dear Mr. Prescott,
Local Government Pension Scheme (LPGS)

I claim my right of appeal to you, as Secretary of State. This was notified
to me by Mr. Goodwin, the Director of Operations of the London Pensions
Fund Authority, in his letter of 5th January 2000, which is enclosed. The
appeal is against the decision not to allow me an early retirement on
medical grounds.

Both the officers, who have dealt with my appeal, have made comments
which are prejudicial. My doctor has said that in his view, I will never
work again. Their view was that the medical grounds are insufficient and
that my background notes to the case are immaterial, sight unseen.

Given that I have the right to attach these notes to the medical
report of my doctor, to maintain that they are immaterial sight unseen,
negates my right. Since my right is statutary, granted by the mother
of parliaments, it should stand and the notes be deemed material evidence.

Please find enclosed copies of my letters to the LPFA dated 25th October 1999
and 2nd December 1999. These together with my letter of 29th April 1999 to
DHSS provide a summary of the case, which will let you decide whether to
proceed further.

The two prejudical comments are given below.

Extract from letter dated 8th November 1999.
From LPFA doctor to LPFA Mr.Scott. Quote
I regret that the enclosures with your letter were not complete, I only
received the first page of Mr Lance's letter of appeal, but none the less,
having reviewed the medical evidence which I have received in this case,
I do not wish to amend or add to my medical report dated 14th October 1999.
Unquote

Extract from letter dated 13th December 1999.
From director to LPFA doctor. Quote
In your letter of 8th November you refer to a "missing page"
from Mr Lance's letter as copied to you. This is now attached
and I shall be obliged if you are able to confirm that this
would have had no material bearing on your opinion.
Unquote

On the bi-focals, mentioned in my letter of 25th Octeber 1999 to LPFA.
It took me two years to find out, that they are not bi-focals. I said
I had trouble with the eye test and nobody believed me. I can get
a refund from the optician.

This brings me to another grounds for appeal. It is a catch 22 situation,
where they think that I am too sick to know, that I am sick enough to
claim early retirement. They are trying to do a "Monty Python Dead Parrot
Sketch" job on me, like the optician did.

You will probably remember how this goes.
Close enough quotation.
I want a refund, for this parrot you sold me?
What's wrong with it?
It's dead.
When did it die?
It was dead, when you sold it to me.
Was it on it's perch, when we sold it to you?
Yes.
Then it must have been alive. How did it stay on it's perch?
It was glued on.
Then how do you know it's dead?
It fell off. It's not even a parrot.
Of course it's a parrot, it's green isn't it?
It's painted green.
End of quotation.

On you being a minister of the crown. Your bill to turn a statute into
guidelines is a bit of a "dead parrot" job. Guidelines are based
on good faith and statutes are based on bad faith. The statute states
that local government authorities shall not "intentionally promote
homosexuality" nor "the acceptability of homosexuality as a pretended
family relationship." Anybody sitting down to teach schoolchildren
respect for unspeakable acts, as a form of family life, cannot be said
to be acting in good faith. It is to be put to a free vote of like
minded politicians; opticians to a man.

Thanking you in anticipation of your kind attention to this matter and
looking forward to the favour of your reply.
Yours sincerely,
Tony Lance
ex-branch president
Boilermakers Trade Union(GMB)
http://web.onetel.com/~tonylance
www.bertha.ndirect.co.uk (disabled)
CC. Internet Usenet newgroups sci.astro et al. (Without addresses, names)

Big Bertha Thing appeal

2nd December 1999
For Attention of Mr. Phillip Goodwin,
Director of Operations,
London Pensions Fund Authority,
Dear Mr. Goodwin,

Local Government Pension Scheme (LPGS)

Further to your letter of 25th November 1999 and our telephone
conversation yesterday, regarding my second appeal.

In your letter you mention that my reservations were conveyed to your doctor.
This was in fact, not the case. In his letter of 8th November 1999, to your
Mr.Scott, what he said is given in the extract below.

"I regret that the enclosures with your letter were not complete, I only
received the first page of Mr. Lance's letter of appeal, but none the less,
having reviewed the medical evidence which I have received in this case,
I do not wish to amend or add to my medical report dated 14th October 1999."

I would thank you for your assurance that my letter of appeal dated
25th October 1999 and my letter to DSS of 29th April 1999 would be taken
into account, in your current independant review of my second appeal,
following the rejection of my application.

I would confirm that there is no further medical evidence to come. There
are, however, two incidents, which may have some bearing. One DSS doctor
asked me why I have had no tests done. I replied that my doctor already
knew what it was. It was a pinched nerve in my back causing my legs to
be inflamed. Another DSS doctor went so far as to lie me down and
examine my legs, to see if they were inflamed. I was not told the
result, but passed my all work fitness test, as unfit for work.

I trust that this will be in order and look forward to the favour of your
reply.
Yours sincerely,
Tony Lance

Big Bertha Thing application

Contact: Tarek El-Din
25th October 1999
London Pension Fund Authority,
Dear Sir,
Re: LOCAL GOVERNMENT PENSION SCHEME.
Further to your letter of 18th October 1999, rejecting my application
for early retirement on medical grounds. I am writing to appeal against
your decision, on the following grounds;-
1. Question of Procedure.
2. Question of Fact.

Twice during the 21 day period to inspect the medical report, I called
at the surgery after 4.30 pm, to be told it was out of office hours, so not
available. The third time, I called at 10.30 am on 18th October 1999, to be
told that the 21 days had expired and the report had already been sent. It
was dated 29th September 1999, which by my reckoning was the 20th day since
it became available. This being said, there was no opportunity to attach
my notes. Hence the procedure had not been complied with.

The report itself, was the first time I had heard of the diagnosis of
sciatica, the three months duration or the infrequent attendance at
surgery. In view of this, I would ask you to bear with me, while I go
through the facts of the case.

On 3rd April 1996, I was told by my doctor, that the strong pain in
both legs was caused by a pinched nerve in my back, which caused my legs
to be inflamed.

I was prescribed 14 No. Voltarol Retard 100 mg tablets, for inflamation.
8 days later the pain stopped, so I still have 6 tablets left.

Since then and continuously for over three years, I have had three well
defined symptons as follows;-
1. I cannot do mental or physical work, for longer than 30 minutes per day.
2. I cannot stand still for longer than 10 minutes, without getting dizzyness
and palpatations.
3. I cannot sit still for an eye test for longer than 7 minutes, without
distress and my eyes going out of focus.

The latest symptom and one which causes me most concern, is that I cannot
read a brand new science fiction book by a favourite author. I recently
returned 12 such books to the library unread. They had been accumulated over
a period of months.

Background circumstances;-
1. 14th October 1990 redundant from job as senior computer programmer.
2. 1991 to 1994 successfully completed first four years towards Open
University degree in Mathematics degree course and awarded Dip.Math(Open)
3. 1995 withdrew from 12 hours per week course, due to family problems.
4. 1996 unable to complete even one homework of 6 hours per week course,
did not take exam and failed course.
5. 1996 fence repairs of 7 hours, actually took 3 weeks at 30 minutes per
day.
6. I have spent 6 years on the dole and 3 years on the sick.
7. MED4 long term sickess note for DSS, simply said general debility.
8. DSS medical exams coducted three times, all with mention of symptoms and
tablets. Passed all work test as unfit for work each time.
9. 4th DSS medical exam deemed unnecessary by DSS, as I was unfit for work.
10. Since I was not receiving treatment, frequent attendance at surgery was
never mentioned by Dr.Cullen.
11. Since 1955 I have been under ENT, with yearly appointments for ear
infections due to mastiod cavity following opperation.
12. I have stopped wearing my hearing aid, due to increased frequency of
infections.
13. I have been unable to wear my bi-focals from new, since 2 out of 4
lenses are out of focus and neither form a useable pair of lenses.
14. I also use a walking stick, inside and outside the home.

I regard both the tablets and the bi-focals as factual evidence, that
would stand up in a court of law or medical enquiry.

Trusting that this appeal will be in order and looking forward to the
favour of your reply.
Yours sincerely,
Tony Lance Dip.Math(Open)

Big Bertha Thing welfare

29th April 1999
Operations Manager,
The Benefits Agency,
Dear Sirs,
Further to your letter of 28th April 1999, regarding a list of
questions, on the possibility of my working at all.

I will attempt to answer your questions, in order as listed in your
letter.

1. I am not working, I am just pottering arround on the internet. I last
registered for course work with the Open University in 1997. This would have
involved 6 hours work per week. I could only manage half-an-hour per day,
so totally failed to do the work or complete the course. Not even one
homework assignment was completed.
In August 1997, I bought a second hand computer for 150 pounds sterling,
and was given free access to the Open University computer along local
telephone lines at a call charge of 1p per minute.
Since that time, I managed to build up a body of correspondence,
within the limits of half-an-hour per day mental or physical work.
In January 1999, this correspondence was transfered by me to my
web site; www.bertha.ndirect.co.uk. I have to pay 14 pounds and 9p per
month for this site.

2. Nobody suggested it, it just happened.
3. My doctor does not know that I have a web site.
4. See answer 1 for description of my activities. No job is being done,
so no job description exists.

5. No employer exists or payments have been recieved.
6. I can think straight for half-an-hour per day. The rest of the time is
spent pottering arround. I can do one side of A4 paper of mathematics or
computer work per day.

7. On any day free of a major shopping expedition, I can do half-an-hour
of original work and about an hour of copy typing at non-typist speeds.

8. My principle interest is a 50 year scientific project, which was started
30 years ago. If I could spend 48 hours per week doing it I would. However
half-an-hour work and an hour pottering, seems to be all I can manage and at
that not every day of the week.
Due to my condition, I asked Mrs. Pam Scruton, a fellow Open
University student to be the project archivist for my work on the Open
University computer. She agreed and kept the archive of the correspondence
which is now on my web site. This is both an unusual request and an
unusually generous service to a fellow student on incapacity benefit.

9. Zero income for as far as the eye can see.
10. Not applicable, zero wages or income.
11. August 1997 and is ongoing.

I trust that the above will put the internet feeding frenzy of the
newspaper hype into some perspective.
Yours faithfully.
Tony Lance Dip.Math(Open)